Relationship Dilemma Remedies

A Blog About Solving Common Relationship Dilemmas

Positivity in Relationships is Contagious

Heather was past the point of being upset with Bruce.  He never helped with children or housework, was constantly pressuring her for sex and ignored all of her requests for conversations about their relationship.

When people who are “past the point of being upset” enter counseling, then I know that someone is giving serious consideration about ending a marriage.  That was indeed the case with Heather.  She was there to talk over her options before leaving Bruce.

Heather agreed to try one more thing before leaving.  She agreed to focus only on the positive.  All of her nagging, negative comments, complaints and criticisms, she agreed to write down but never say.  She would look for and comment on any efforts that Bruce made in the right direction.

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January 17, 2012 Posted by | advice, Be A Better Spouse, happy marriages, marriage, positivity | 1 Comment

Marriage Check-Up

Is my marriage headed in the right direction or is it in trouble?

Answer the questions on this marriage check-up to find out how things are going in your marriage. One person can certainly answer these alone. If you both answer them and then talk about the questions, it will help you get a better understanding of your partner, how each of you think and feel about the relationship.

Sometimes couples can get off-track without even recognizing it. This marriage check-up will give you some ideas for areas to “tweak” or talk over with your partner.

Marriage Check-Up

1. My spouse and I generally know what is happening in each other‘s life.
Yes          No

2. We laugh together and are usually in a good mood when we are with each other.
Yes          No

3. We find time to touch each other, with love, at several different times during each day.
Yes          No

Click here to complete this marriage check-up.

Counseling Relationships Online

Couples Counseling of Louisville

Healing from Affairs

July 5, 2010 Posted by | advice, Be A Better Spouse, couples, marriage | Leave a comment

8. Show Affection.

8.  Be affectionate. Signs of physical affection are very important in a marriage.  Some say “I was not born up that way.  It is not me”.  We say … change!  The more that you show love and affection to your spouse, the more both of you will feel love and affection.

We are not talking about heavy PDA here … just small ways to reach out and physically touch your spouse in loving ways.  Men usually want this every bit as much as women do.

Today, find 3 ways to reach out to your spouse and pay attention to what happens.

Counseling Relationships Online

Couples Counseling of Louisville

We are very interested in your feedback on these ideas.  What do you do to be a good spouse?

February 2, 2010 Posted by | Be A Better Spouse, happy marriages, marriage | Leave a comment

7. Learn To Be A Good Listener

7.  Listen more than you talk. You do not always have to have an answer, input or “constructive feedback” when your spouse is talking about a problem.

It is not always about you when your spouse complains.  You may really not understand what she or he is saying or asking if your respond too quickly,

For today, vow that you will listen and ask questions more than you talk with your spouse.  Note the results.

Counseling Relationships Online
Couples Counseling of Louisville

February 1, 2010 Posted by | Be A Better Spouse, happy marriages, marriage | 1 Comment

6. Think And Act In Ways That Promote Partnership

6.  Think of your marriage as a partnership. Sometimes it may seem easier to make decisions on your own.

People sometimes make decisions alone because they know if they include their spouse, there will be a veto.

The repercussions of handling things independently often comes at a greater cost to the relationship.  While some couples might agree that one spouse is the leader in a certain area, like parenting, and can make many of the decisions, often it is good to “run things by” a spouse.

Review decisions that you have made on your own.  Think about the reasons that you chose to make them alone and assess the cost to your relationship.

Counseling Relationships Online
Couples Counseling of Louisville

January 31, 2010 Posted by | Be A Better Spouse, happy marriages, marriage | Leave a comment

5. Make Your Spouse Your Best Friend

5.  Talk to your spouse as if he or she were your very best friend. What kinds of things do you tell your best friend?  How do you talk with him or her?  Is there a level of intimacy with your friend that is missing with your spouse?  Is there a level of respect with your friend that is missing with your spouse?

It is great to have close friendships; however, in healthy marriages, the closest friendship, the confidante, is the spouse.

Treat your spouse today as you would your very best friend in the whole wide world.

Counseling Relationships Online
Couples Counseling of Louisville

January 30, 2010 Posted by | Be A Better Spouse, couples, marriage | Leave a comment

4. Think About Your Partner During The Day

4.  Think about your spouse as you go about your daily life.  Make it a habit to just think about your spouse and what he or she might like as you go about your day.  If there are small things that you think of, find a way to make it happen.

We often give or do for others what we want for ourselves.  It is better for the relationship when we think about what the other person might want and give them that.

Let your spouse know that you are thinking about him or her today in some small way.

Counseling Relationships Online


Couples Counseling of Louisville

January 29, 2010 Posted by | Be A Better Spouse, marriage, showing love | Leave a comment

Tip Number 3: Being A Better Half Includes Taking Care of Yourself.

3.  Take good care of yourself … your health and your appearance.  Showers, clean clothes, attention paid to your grooming and maintaining a healthy diet show respect for yourself and are also a way to say to your spouse “it is important for me to look good for you.”

Decide one simple thing that you can do for yourself today that will say “my health and my appearance are important to me.  Being healthy and showing that I care about my appearance is one way to say ‘I love you‘.”

Counseling Relationships Online


Couples Counseling of Louisville

January 28, 2010 Posted by | Be A Better Spouse, couples, keeping love alive, marriage | Leave a comment